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This page was last updated on January 06, 2009 .

Bait-and-Switch Syndrome (BSS)
by: Larry Walker, 2/10/04

Not to be confused with BSE, Bait-and-Switch Syndrome (BSS) is sweeping the nation and bringing Americans to their knees. This wasted brain disease constitutes an eminent threat to our nation's security and is spread from the Oval Office by all known vectors, and probably some that are as yet unknown. There is presently no cure available for BSS, but one is expected to be released in November 2004. BSS is believed to be caused by a prionic mutation of the faith gene.

While BSS mimics many other conditions and can be difficult to diagnose, you may be in the early stages of BSS if you are experiencing any of the following symptoms:

  • Have no faith in faith based government

  • Shell-shocked by faith based defense

  • Assign an IQ of less than 60 to faith based intelligence

  • Broke and broken by faith based economic policies

  • Sick of faith based medical programs

  • Recognize faith based science as an oxymoron

  • Gasping from faith based environmental policies

  • Illiterate from faith based education funding

  • Mugged by faith based law enforcement funding

  • A victim of xenophobic treatment overseas due to faith based foreign affairs

  • Losing faith in faith

Pending the expected release of the cure in November, the only known treatment for mitigating some of the symptoms of BSS is to lighten up a little and CLICK HERE for a gazillion smiles!